Silent Walls and Summer Nights

This is my third song I've ever written, so I feel really happy and somewhat as if I've achieved something great. Also, I really appreciate the comments on my last two poems. You guys are awesome, and it's great to feel welcomed. 
This is something I wrote at night, and it's very short, I'm afraid. It's inspired by feelings of depression and uncertainty, but feel perfectly free to interpret it as you see fit.  The "oh's" at the end look really cheap and basic, but they're carrying the rest of the chorus melody, which is hummed. It's sort of a slow, moody song. 
Again, criticism is desired and encouraged, so if there's something you think would make my work better, by all means speak up. As long as it's politely worded, we're cool. 

BR


Verses: It's late
I should be in bed 
Too many complicated thoughts are running 'round inside my head 

Lately I've 
Been preoccupied 
With morbid thoughts for no good reason
I blame my teenage mind 

Chorus:
 Will you, stranger
Please tell me 
If this feeling lasts forever 
Or fades away with the night 

If you know 
Please let me 
'Cause these walls are silent 
As the grave this summer night 

Oh,oh,oh
Oh,oh,oh 

Oh,oh,oh
Oh,oh,oh
Copyright © | Year Posted 2016


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