Seagulls of Barry Island

The sea gulls down at Barry aren’t your average little pests They think they own the sea side and the all wear hooded vests Their beaks are pierced with hoops and studs and drink from cans of bud . Beady eyes watch picnics They truly are such thugs And if you purchase chips from the shop behind the beach don’t believe you can relax with those tasty scrumptious treats They’ll watch you exchange money with hungry look upon your face then hunt you down and rob you with their spray cans full of mace Dive-bombing little children is their favourite thing to do then you think they’ve gone but you’d be wrong when they shower you with poo These antisocial birdies are quite partial to an ale they really do belong down in Barry Island jail So be warned these birds are dangerous Theres no stopping them you know With their gang tattoos and leathers Wearing boots with steal capped toes. You can tell that they mean business and with a welsh sarcastic twang they bully staff and customers at the local Ice cream van So pack yourself protection A helmet and a sword A shield , a coat of armour Bring all you can afford Apart from that it’s glorious A lovely golden beach But I wouldn’t risk a smile if you’re wearing your false teeth