Pene Grande

Pene Grande (what I learned from the web today) When you talk about mummies, Pene Grande Would best be discussed when the kids were away He was a mummy famed in his life For having (well something that sure pleased his wife) When he passed on, his new mummy home Was in Palermo, Sicily’s old catacomb The story is told of a young newlywed Whose less than large husband was not much in bed So she took a cloth and rubber Pene Grande’s fame Then turned to her husband and rubbed him the same The next night she lay with her husband and felt A much greater presence and her heart did melt When she opened her eyes, she screamed No, No, Sir! For it was the ghost of Pene upon her Everyone thought her crazy but it happened again The next time with her husband, it sure wasn’t him An exorcist said to get rid of the ghost We must capture him when he exits the host So a metal codpiece was affixed to her mate And the lady lay back as a bit of ghost bait Then as if on cue, Pene Grande came forth Just as her husband was pointing due north Then holy water was sprinkled and “poof” The ghost was expelled, her husband the proof Pene Grande’s spirit went back on his shelf Left the husband’s small unit a mere ghost of itself As for the ghost, he gained quite a crowd Of little old ladies whose husbands stood proud Rubbed by their women who wanted to lay Even with ghosts for a “Pene Grande” But the mummy’s now locked up so no one can touch Cause even for Pene – too much is too much