Panic
jolt out of bed at 3 in the morning, my little voice screaming
WHERE AM I?
the reflection in the bathroom mirror is hazy
WHO AM I?
half of my brain sends a message and the other half denies it
wash your face, it will calm you down
NO! you will drown
cry it out like you usually do
NO! you will not be able to breath and turn blue
go outside for fresh air
it is summer and humid, ahhh more dispair
i feel lost my mind is not in control
I AM lost, i have lost my soul
i cannot handle myself, WHY?
my only outlet is to die...
what is happening am i insane?
how did this happen?
i know there is no one to blame...
i fell asleep perfect...and know i don't recognize
it all seems different...Am i in disguise?
i can't even snap myself into reality
am i dying? i feel alone and confused
it isn't even a dream that i can shake
so i prayed hard, MAY THE LORD, MY SOUL TAKE
im still here, just scared of the next time
i cannot help but think, will i sink deeper or will i be just fine
my only consolation is my faith in the LORD
i live by him, like some live by the sword...
Copyright © Delia Maria Espinoza | Year Posted 2009
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