Johneta Ohler Poet Spoken Word

Not a Placeholder

I am not someone who is willing to wait
 for you to decide if I meet your standards.

I am not a woman
 who auditioned for love
 just to be kept on standby.

I am a woman who knows her worth,
 and I will not settle
 for anything less than what I deserve.

I am not your warmth when you are cold.
I am not the comfort  you crawl back to
 when loneliness starts biting at your pride.
I am not the placeholder
 for when you can’t stand yourself
 in an empty room.

I am not the woman you choose last.

I am not a backup plan.

I am not your convenience.

I am the woman you realize you lost
 too late.

I am the one that got away.

The one you think about
 when you finally meet someone else
 and it still doesn’t feel right.
The one you miss 
when your options run out
 and you realize
 you had something real
 and treated it like it was replaceable.
You held me at a distance
 like love was something
 you could turn on and off
pulling me close
only when it benefited you.

Only when it was easy.

Only when you were bored.

But listen,
My best friend said
 what scares her the most
 is that I am calm.

And I am.

Not because I don’t feel.

Not because it didn’t hurt.

I am calm because I am done.

I am calm,
 because anger is expensive
 and you can’t afford
 another second of me.
They want me to lash out.
They want me to look crazy.
They want me to beg
 so they can feel powerful.

But I stay calm
 because I already know the truth:

You didn’t break me.

You just lost me.

And one day
 you will sit with the weight
 of what you let go.

Not because I’ll come back.

But because you will finally understand
 that I was never hard to love.
You were just too immature
 to hold something valuable
 without fumbling it.

So no…

I’m not the woman you get when you’re lonely.

I’m not the one you circle back to.

I’m not the lesson you get to learn over and over again.

I am the woman 
 you will remember
 every time you realize
 you will never find another me.
And that?
That is your consequence.

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Ghairo Daniels February 11, 2026 at 2:41 PM Excellent Poem on self-Love, self-care, knowing your worth & leaving intact. I love it. ThkU for sharing. Well done, Johneta. I love that you wrote it in Spoken Word. Gives message of integrity more power.