Lineage

I sit here with guilt and recent understanding. I didn’t know what I didn’t know. I sit here with remorse, and now I’m rebranding. Because to live is to learn and to learn is it grow. It is like I stepped in your shoes when I became a mother. You were doing your best, one foot in front of the other. They don’t know yet that I really don’t know. But, to live is to learn and to learn is to grow. Because one day they are here and the next they are gone. In parenthood, there’s much more grief than what was led on. You cradle and hold and put them to sleep. Then you find yourself trying your best not to weep. At times we wouldn’t speak, and at times, we would fight. I don’t remember the last time I hugged you goodnight. One day it stops and it hurts indescribably bad. So many times, I just want to speak with my dad. Time is precious but quick to pass by. You deserve more credit than I ever provide. These kids are my world, of the lengths I would go. To live is to learn and to learn is to grow.