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Last Wishes

Tap, Tap, Tap! Carla’s pen keeps hitting the table, As she writes her final thoughts. She attempts to explain to her mother, How it wasn’t her fault. She tried so hard, To raise her right. It wasn’t her fault, That her daughters life crumbled, Right before her eyes. It wasn’t her fault, That she didn’t know. How could she? Her daughter hid it so well. She finishes the note, And signs with her best wishes. Wishes that her mother would be ok, Wishes that she could see, It had nothing to do with her, Wishes that everyone could just forget. Forget about her! “I Love You”, Carla adds at the end. Three simple words, That would be carved in her mothers mind. Not for a week, Not even for a month, But until the day she dies. Carla gets up. Walks over to her dresser, Leaving the note behind. Reaches into the top drawer, And pulls out a gun. Her hands are trembling, Lips quivering, Knees beginning to give way. Slowly making her way to the bed, She crawls under the covers. Places the barrel of the gun, Against her temple. Her pointer finger, Lingering over the trigger. She pulls it in, And nothing. No pain, No bang, No death, Nothing! She must have left a bullet out, While she quickly loaded the gun. Now realizing, What she is doing. Tears come flowing out of her eyes, Like a salt-water waterfall. She’s sobbing now, Good thing no ones home. Placing her finger back on the trigger, She pulls one last time. It hit her, Like a rock thrown through a window. Her skull shattered, Her tears stopped It was over, Over and done with! She was gone! No worries left to think about, No life left to care about! Yet she was still sad. Killing herself, Had not given her the satisfaction, She so dearly desired. It felt like another bullet hit her, As she discovered this would haunt her. Haunt her for all eternity, In the after-life. The moment she pulled the trigger, The sorrow she felt, Would never leave. It would play over and over, In her mind. Her soul could never rest, After what she did. Dieing was not at all what she hoped was her Last Wish!

Copyright © | Year Posted 2010

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