In a Constant Flux

Up. Down. Up. Up. Up. Down. Down. Up. Up. Down. Down. Down. Up. Down. Stay. I was dreaming of death. In my nightmare of life. Taking a smoke break. Smashing the clock. Making small fires and walking away sipping water. Letting go. Jumping in. Sneaking cautiously. Smelling the air. Murdering my spies so I alone know. Patiently lying... breathing in and out. One breath. One shot. Focusing. Pulling the trigger. Being the spade. Don't want you as my friend. Just want to feel your shape once more. Your breath is gone. Mine remains. You die. I live. My nightmare of you in Heaven in your dream of me in Hell. I wait. I breathe. I wait... for the chang