I Am One Woman

I am One Woman by Lori Maria Walton Dedicated to women who have suffered abuse around the globe who need hope after the tragedies in everyday life, the disappointments we encounter along the way, and the beauty that remains inside, but we so often fail to see. Left alone to die in a cell that is limited to your command Why do women leave their only self To join as a slave to the one who laughs at their weakness Deems them unworthy through all tasks In spite of all the hard work I stand here amazed at my own naivety Chasing a dream of what I’m supposed to be Leaving the love and freedom of who I really am To begin a life with someone who cares less Than I ever could A baby is what I was hoping for A baby has evaded me Leaving me only with your spirit of criticism Whispering to me that somehow, I am really not ok Even for a moment Doubt beyond doubt Piles up to the ceiling Along with all the initials that stand behind my name Mocking me that I could only enjoy a false sense Of victory over anything Everything I have failed Nothing have I succeeded in or feel as though I have Made a mark beyond a small tainted coloring On the glimpse of life that meets my eyes In every dawn Shall I continue this nonsensical dance Waiting for someone to acknowledge my ability To provide something valuable to my family, society, and self? Or shall I retreat into the secrecy of the spirit That haunts my being I am one woman One spirit that wakes every morning A brief moment do I savor the morning prayer The burgeoning flowered tree bowing to me and opening its door To come in and dine I cannot open my soul again I cannot be all that I want to be for you as I was I can only sit beneath this old maple and dream of days When I fully saw light, hope, and love within each soul And lifted myself to new heights through a window That never existed.