I Am As I Am

Perhaps
	you've wondered 
	what’s up with me, 
	why I’m blue some days, 
	other times electric yellow,
	why I talk too fast
	or not at all,
	why I cry, 
	then laugh, 
	then cry again. 
	You may have been puzzled 
	by my sometimes strangeness, 
	about what makes me tick. 
	The fact is, 
	I always tell the correct time; 
	all you have to do is ask. 

	Since you asked...

	I have a disorder, 
	or two, 
	or three.
	I have bipolar, you see, 
	and I get the rollercoaster 
	that comes with it.
	The only questions are:
	how steep the climb, 
	how fast the fall? 

	I’m not crazy 
	(I avoid the “C” word.);
	I have an illness 
	(I’m not that illness.);
	I take my meds 
	(two blue and three white).
	I lead a normal life, 
	whatever “normal” means. 
	I no longer feel 
	the stigma of being different. 
	I am as I am.

	There you have it, 
	the skim of my truth. 
	Now you know about me; 
	what’s your story?
Copyright © | Year Posted 2013

Poem

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Bono Avatar
July 9, 2013 at 7:07 PM
this is fantastic.I do think you know how I feel.I stopped all my meds recently.If I cant make it without them,I don't need to be here.Love Colleen
Jordan Avatar
July 9, 2013 at 8:51 PM
DBSA = Depression and Bipolar Support Alliance, www.dbsalliance.org/ The site can connect you with local groups and facilitators. It's not AA or a twelve step program, just people like you and me.
Jordan Avatar
July 9, 2013 at 8:47 PM
From my personal experience, if you are going to go off your meds, tell your doctor to help you do so. Your doc will object, as he/she should, but will probably help you. Don't do cold turkey! I don't know where you live, but you could contact a chapter of DBSA, a support group. I belong, and I'm glad I do. My best hopes to you. Jack
Hunter Avatar
June 10, 2013 at 6:00 AM
Congrats on your win with this one, Jack. It's well deserved!
Jordan Avatar
June 10, 2013 at 6:50 AM
Thanks, Caleb. Sometimes it's therapeutic to just speak one's fears out loud. I appreciate your comment... Jack
Oyewole Avatar
June 9, 2013 at 9:37 PM
A true gem from the heart! I enjoyed your enlightened poem Jack. Big Congrats to you on your well deserved placement in the contest. AO
Jordan Avatar
June 9, 2013 at 10:25 PM
Thank you. I appreciate the comments... Jack
Oyewole Avatar
June 9, 2013 at 10:01 PM
Typo! ...craziness...
Oyewole Avatar
June 9, 2013 at 10:00 PM
Yes Jack, you aren't crazy. There is no crazy in being realistic.
Gasun Avatar
June 9, 2013 at 12:52 AM
Congratulations on your well-deserved awesome win and great write my dear friend Jack! love/hugs, Leonora
Jordan Avatar
June 9, 2013 at 8:47 AM
Thank you , Lenora. Your comment means a lot to me... Jack
Delaney Avatar
June 9, 2013 at 12:18 AM
Congrats on your first place win. It is always refreshing to read an honest work. Keep on writing. SuZ
Jordan Avatar
June 9, 2013 at 8:46 AM
hak you for the kind words... Jack
Dietrich Avatar
June 8, 2013 at 11:20 PM
reading the comments below, I can see this is a truthful poem. I like the way you tell your story. You are not alone in this. My hubbie takes three pills for depression/anxiety. On a bad day, even the pills hardly work. Sorry for your struggles, Jack.
Jordan Avatar
June 9, 2013 at 8:38 AM
Thank you, Andrea. I really appreciate your husband's plight. Please give him my best. I'm going to attempt to send you a soup mail... Jack
Gildersleeve Avatar
June 8, 2013 at 3:34 PM
Many, many permutations of normal. Congratulation on your superb win Jack. A well deserve win. Warm Smiles, Connie
Jordan Avatar
June 8, 2013 at 4:30 PM
Thank you, Connie.
Ryerson Avatar
June 8, 2013 at 2:04 PM
Not sure I know what 'normal' is either, Jack (Maybe there's no such thing?) This kinda reminds me of a Waylon Jennings song... 'I've ALWAYS been crazy and that's what's kept me from going insane'... Congratulations with this outstanding and courageous peace of work - Tim
Jordan Avatar
June 8, 2013 at 2:41 PM
Thank you, Tim. Waylon may have had it right. When I was much younger I assumed everyone I knew was okay. I now realize there are many permutations of normal, and many more that just aren't.
A   Avatar
June 8, 2013 at 11:29 AM
Congratulations!!! Jack, nice to see you on Nates' winning list. By the looks of his winners, it seems as if he's a real picky person.... xox~ Linda
Jordan Avatar
June 8, 2013 at 11:38 AM
Thanks Linda. To tell the truth, the poem is so personal I wasn't certain it was appropriate for the contest. I guess it was.. Jack
D. Avatar
June 7, 2013 at 8:22 PM
congrats on your win, close enough to the theme'
Jordan Avatar
June 7, 2013 at 9:22 PM
Thank you, and thanks for considering my writing, especially for something personal.
Carrillo Avatar
April 11, 2013 at 9:29 PM
Jack; Thanks for telling us about yourself. When we get to a certain age - we all have problems. To me you are a fine gentleman ..... Lucilla
Jordan Avatar
April 11, 2013 at 9:35 PM
Thank you, Lucilla. That's a very kind thing for you to say. And you're exactly right about age... Jack
Hicks Avatar
April 11, 2013 at 10:22 AM
Good one Jack! This poem shows me a lot more about who you are as a person. I wouldn't say I have a disorder; aside from being antsy, nervous, pacing constantly, and a little on the OCD side. I haven't been able to check up on some of my favorites poets cause I've been in the UK (and still am) on vacation. I hope I can stop by more often!
Jordan Avatar
April 11, 2013 at 10:25 AM
Thanks, Timothy. I hope you are enjoying your time in the UK. Stop by anytime... Jack
Hunter Avatar
April 10, 2013 at 12:19 PM
Way to lay it out there, Jack. You sound cool and unpredictable....the most interesting kind of person...Great work!
Jordan Avatar
April 10, 2013 at 12:39 PM
Thanks, Caleb. That means a lot to me, coming from you. I value your opinion... Jack
A   Avatar
April 10, 2013 at 9:28 AM
wow, where do I start, when it comes to me... I like all truthful issues about you. Your skin is thick and thin. thank you very much~ PD
Jordan Avatar
April 10, 2013 at 10:17 AM
You are more than welcome. This is new and risky for me, but your response tells me all is well. Thank you again... Jack
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