Grannys laughing cake
I often think back to that care free age and those wondrous six weeks of school holidays,
The Prison was out ,
nothing more to learn and with any luck the place would burn .
It was off too the country and out of the smoke to see my granny and her miserable bloke,
"don't touch my greenhouse and keep off my grass, still your voices or I'll tan yer ***".
Them's were the rules and we were obliged to obey if we wanted no trouble and expected to stay .
We had Lots to do and mischief to undertake ,grandad would growl and granny would bake .
upon the clock reaching three, there was now a truce and we sat for tea .
here's the strange thing and I know it sounds daft but when he'd eaten ,the miserable bloke would laugh.
Not for a bit or even a while but table thumping hysterics with a belly aching smile .
"What the hell' ,and where have we come"
this old bloke was mad or was he just dumb ?.
His laughing was real and In no way fake he'd not been drinking but only eating cake .
As my small hand reached across the table the plate was snatched so I wasn't able .
"This isn't for you" ,came my granny's voice," there's flack jacks and muffins you make your choice,
she walked away and out of sight with the cake disappearing for the rest of the night.
My grandad kept up with his cheerful mood then just stared at the folds in the curtains and was totally glued.
My granny asked ‘and so I said "The muffins were OK" but that cake was in my head ,
"no my dear I've already said that's not for you the subjects dead".
So be it I thought to my self ,
these old folk will need sleep and I know stealth .
It was after ten and much later that day when finally their snoring gave it away.
Now's the time it's not to late I'm heading out to have me some cake .
The Creaking floor boards froze my soul ,but bravely onward I traveled toward my goal .
A forbidding dark front room and cool kitchen floor only served to encourage me to go on once more,
And there it was upon the shelf this golden prize this reward of stealth .
Reaching up, did I just hear another ? ,sure enough my baby brother.
Sucking his thumb and rubbing his eyes ,"I came to find you, OO ! , that looks nice ".
"Don't speak so loud or you'll wake them up there !
and that old geezer for our excuses he won't care ".
I took the cake and placed it on the table very pleased with my self as now we were able .
The first few bites were cautious and fearful for discovery would no doubt end with tearful .
We ate our fill and started to doubt what grandmas cake had been all about ,
but after a while we felt the effect ,
we started to chuckle ‘there was no regret .
I looked at my brother he couldn't look me in the face ,he was crouched in silent hysterics grabbing at his at aching waist ,
Shhhh I laughingly pleaded "for the love of god ‘you'll wake our granny and that old sod" .
Replacing a plate back on a shelf sounds easy and plain but howlingly trying it To us seemed in vain ,
My brothers madness I must now admit ,made me fall about a lot and continue to fit .
Eventually succeeding we replaced that cake and comically crept back up before being too late.
Later that night a famished hunger ensued and too the curtains folds my eyes were now also glued .
for years until I was twenty three I'd often wondered of grans recipe,
It wasn't apple or even banana but that miserable old bloke's
home grown marijuana.
Copyright © Simon King | Year Posted 2020
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