Goodbye Norma Jean

A photo on a dating site How gorgeous that girl looked By text we flirted all that night And I was truly hooked She looked like a celebrity Like Marilyn Monroe With sexy eyes and pouting lips And slim from head to toe We texted till we felt at ease And then we made the choice We swapped our numbers eagerly To chat some more by voice She said some sexy things to me (And some that made me blush) I praised her lovely curly hair She praised her own hairbrush But I’m a proper cockney And it turns out so was she One thing she did the same as me Was say ‘H’ silently So when we met I got a shock It seemed I’d got it wrong Her ‘H’ had not been silent For an ‘H’ did not belong She hadn’t used her hairbrush And her airbrush was long gone Because the girl in front of me Looked just like Elton John ______________ [‘Goodbye Norma Jean’ from ‘Candle In The Wind’ by the aforementioned Mr John]