Getting a Wife
Getting a Wife......
When I was just a stripling lad
My Father said to me
Get yourself a wife my boy
And here’s how she must be
Sufficient mouth to sweetly smile
But not enough to nag
Sufficient breast to fill your hand
But not enough to sag
Two hands to do the washing up
And bring you pots of ale
As you sit lordly on your throne
Because you are the male
Brains enough to understand
The wisdom of your ways
But not enough to question them
And clutter up your days
A body plump but firm and full
And good to look at too
So you can show her off all day
As she belongs to you
A wife, a nurse, a mother sweet
All rolled up into one
A mistress, whore and lover too
So you can have your fun
If you can find a girl like this
You’re a very lucky lad
I fear she’ll be too much for you
So bring her home to dad
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