Mark Springer Poet Rhyme

Chick magnet

People used to think I had some special rapport
A MD-PhD explained that I was a slob to the core
He claimed I did not wash, so I exuded Pheromones
Thus attracting females, with 2 X chromosomes.

It's true some ladies saw me as a potential mate
But the consensus was that I was second rate.
I had a wholesome image, and some people gave a cheer.
But familiarity breeds contempt, and rebound breeds a sneer.

I met men and women who gave me a high five
How could I tell them I felt more dead than alive?
I didn't feel their warmth, enthusiasm or a spark.
Thoughts came slow when chatting, slow like an Aardvark.

My advice to guys who want to drag a net
Here is the secret to being a chick magnet
Have your friends spread a rumor that beauty strikes your heart.
Then play hard to get, the challenge does its part.

If that doesn't do the job
You could try plan 'B' and be a slob
That might backfire, but I'm sure you agree
You don't know as much as an MD-PhD.

Last year I told my Mom I was handsome back in '88
She burst out laughing, my ego did deflate
My brothers get along with me when I'm not a pest.
But me as a celebrity would strike them as a jest.

I envy you if warmth and heart are what you feel
But you should keep it grounded; you should keep it real.
The cost of a friendly smile is cheap
But it reflects something warm and strong and deep.

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