Bad Season

How could you do that to yourself? You don't even have the slightest idea of how it felt. You are just making things up, You have no idea how hard it is to coverup. All the pain I went through, Seems meaningless after seeing myself with no clue. Tried so hard to not look at others. But kept self sabotaging one after the other. Never thought I'd ever end up here, But that's what you get after dealing with extreme pain and fear. Life gets better and everything happens for a reason, But deep down we all know that I am meant to be a bad season.