Spidey Williams | + Follow Poet |
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At Times

At times I just sit and I WONDER,
 	what is my MISSION?
What is my ultimate goal or in other WORDS,
what is my life’s VISIONS?
At times I sit and THINK,
what will people actually say about my NAME,
when I no longer BLINK?

What stories will be told about my LIFE,
 to my kids, and my kid’s KIDS,
with the life I chose to LIVE?

At Times I HURT!
Wondering why, did God choose so MANY
 	 of my loved ones to be carried in a HEARSE.
At times I pray it was I lying lifeless under a pile of DIRT.

At times I PONDER,
what is truly is out YONDER!
At times my eyes grow TEARY.
 	other times my body grows WEARY.

At times my mood CHANGES,
other times I think, 
the ones we call the normal,
 are truly STARNGE.

At times I consider even myself mentally crazy and DERRANGE.
At times I lie other times I ADMITT,
that at times I just want to QUIT.

At times I want to give back my LIFE.
At times I think I would have been better off WHITE. 
At times I don’t know what to think at ALL.
At times even I need a friend to CALL.
At times I thrive for ATTENTION,
other times I just want one person to LISTEN.

At times I try to feel God’s PAIN.
Other times my tears flow more than a day’s worth of RAIN.
At times I want to call timeout from life’s GAMES.
Other times I feel too EMBARASSED, 
holding down my head, 
as I walk away in SHAME.
At times I even imagine myself is hell’s FLAMES.
Other times I imagine literally going INSANE.

At times I just want to FIGHT,
other times I just want to WRITE.
At times no thoughts comes to my head,
 	so I sit at my computer,
 wishing I could TYPE.

At times I wish I was raising a SON
Other times I feel like,
 squeezing a trigger of a GUN!
But all the time,
I’m thriving in everything to be second to NONE!

Copyright © Spidey Williams | Year Posted 2006

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