Anxiety

My heart like a green leaf drank deep of the sun
And was never satisfied, but ever in the wind dance
Like a schizophrenic child, hungry for more fun.
I yearn unending for fresh love and lintless romance
Something without dusk, and a chasm to groan
The anticipation of another dawn,  
The longing for the comfort gone,
The emptiness outside the soul
Void of fleece, void of mythic gold
For everything I loved seemed always but a loan.

No voyage through the dripping wet of morning trees
To find the source of song with painstaking eye
Or shiver in the palm of a gentle gushing breeze 
Can quite the desire so innate, appease or satisfy
Was it something steroid in my mother's blood
Or something in my ancestral spirit
That claim these fragments, sand spit
And bar, but cannot love them same
As the naked dances round the flame 
Too shallow here silvern salt within the mud.
Copyright © | Year Posted 2010

Poem

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Emerald Avatar
February 15, 2010 at 6:21 PM
Is it possible that maybe we all love, and deep in our hearts consider it currency - a mental currency to which we use to buy happiness and joy? and lack of this currency leads to sadness and drowning? anyway good write, I loved it. keep the mind flowing -- R. Emerald
Hilliker Avatar
February 14, 2010 at 8:38 AM
I really enjoyed the line "For everything I loved seemed always but a loan." A very gentle and thought provoking poem.
Smith-Johnsen Avatar
February 10, 2010 at 4:21 AM
Deep abiding love...the prize of life...and there is God. Excellent write, L'nass. (As always>)
Haick Avatar
February 9, 2010 at 10:30 PM
L'nass, a wonderfully talented poet! This is really deep, truly profound. ...Was it something steriod in my Mother's blood... This causes great introspection, my friend! Peace, Audrey P.S. Thanks for taking the time to read my poems and leave your kind comments. I truly appreciate it all!
Sepulvado Anderson Avatar
February 9, 2010 at 6:48 PM
"but a loan"!!! Powerful and so thought provokingly profound. Love reading your material. Thanks for your visit and kind comments. Much love and support to you and I can't wait to read more. Have a great day! Scarlett
Loving Iii Avatar
February 9, 2010 at 5:34 PM
"always but a loan" and "lint" are the words that left an impression on me. i know what you mean. john
Devonshire Avatar
February 9, 2010 at 3:51 PM
There is a compelling sense of longing in this amazing poem, Shango. "For everything I loved seemed always but a loan" is such a profoundly disturbing thought. Brilliant writing, as I have come to expect from you, my friend. Love, Carolyn
Guzzi Avatar
February 9, 2010 at 2:24 PM
I wove a dream into yours Soup Mail. Light & Love
Marcum Wong Avatar
February 8, 2010 at 7:45 PM
L'nass, There is no perfect love, only perfection in finding we are all flawed in some way as life has a way of proving. I really love the line you ended this poem with. I hope I understood your meaning? This is profound. Blessings, Connie
Chircop Avatar
February 8, 2010 at 5:21 PM
I enjoyed reading this gem,Its deep,powerful too,echoes from the deepest well's Heart..excellent my friend..Charma
Mason Avatar
February 8, 2010 at 4:00 PM
Perhaps in another life we lost a great love and carry that memory within us ... just a guess ... smile "for everything I loved seemed always but a loan" is one of the most profound lines I think I've ever read here at the Soup, L'nass ... I certainly relate ... LOL ... I've added this to my "favorites" list ...
Culverhouse Avatar
February 8, 2010 at 3:52 PM
enjoyed reading today.
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