Beautiful Scars Poet Rhyme

A Messed Up Dented Can

I saved all my pride,
held pain deep inside,
oh, how I tried…
But he was just a man, 
who couldn’t understand,
who I really am-
a messed up dented can. 

With nowhere to run, 
and all madness undone,
bleeding just for fun.
But he was just an old soul,
tried to push when I’d pull,
his life took a sorry toll,
with a dented can not half full. 

Forgive me for my lies, 
and wearing this disguise,
I see how he tries…
But he is just ash and dust,
where longing is a must,
I screamed, I fussed;
I’m a dented can made of rust. 

Never again will I hide,
exuding all my pride, 
and oh, how I tried…
But he was just a man, 
a tidal wave on dry land,
who could never understand-
I’m just a messed up dented can. 


Dented Cans Poetry Contest
John Lawless
January 9th, 2018

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Line Gauthier April 19, 2018 at 10:57 PM A very endearing poem. Laura. Love it. Congrats.

Maureen McGreavy Pigeon Tart January 14, 2018 at 1:02 PM A moving poem Luloo, congrats on your win! xomo :)

Ronald Kent January 13, 2018 at 8:05 PM Liked this one LL.

Jan Allison January 13, 2018 at 4:55 PM lovely use of metaphor LuLoo congrats on your win:-) hugs Jan xx

John Lawless January 13, 2018 at 12:42 PM Laura, I like the sharp rhythm and flow of this. Sharp, vibrant, and chilling...thanks for entering the contest.

Frederic Parker January 9, 2018 at 1:34 PM nice concept well delivered...good luck dear poet

Janice Canerdy January 9, 2018 at 12:12 PM Great use of metaphor in this moving piece, Luloo! Janice

Joanna Daniel January 9, 2018 at 9:05 AM Sad write, Laura..great metaphor:) Beautiful Scars January 9, 2018 at 10:29 AM thank you dear Jo ;)-luloo