A Huge Surprise

Looking for your twinkling eyes,
I found instead a huge surprise - 
eyes like olive pits 

A fishy smile beneath those eyes,
grey grimace that you can’t disguise-
sardine on a Ritz!

(just Susan and i playing around with that tail-
rhyme form She is first stanza; I am second.)

Copyright © | Year Posted 2011



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12
Date: 4/13/2014 12:19:00 PM
Andrea Such a cute and fun write. Full of silliness and humor. Makes the reader smile and chuckle. Thank you for the nice comment on my Cold Hearted poem. I fixed it like you suggested. Hugs
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Date: 2/10/2013 2:08:00 PM
oh wow, cut them eyes out,, this sure is different,, but as usual love what you do...
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Date: 8/16/2011 11:01:00 AM
Glad you are having fun. Congrats on your anniversary. How many? love phyl
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Date: 8/13/2011 4:28:00 PM
LOL, I know you've both got great senses of humour - is that the plural for a sense of humour? - and this one is such fun : )
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Date: 8/9/2011 11:53:00 PM
yes Andrea I made up the title but the poem refers to a legend of the "Strega" and old woman who steals husbands..oh.. here take mine with his temper..haha.. and "nonna" is like for grandmother type... and 'femme' is like femme fatale because she destroys men according to legend with her pasta pot.. haha.. the way to a mans heart IS through his tum tum..haha..
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Date: 8/9/2011 6:41:00 PM
Enjoyed the fun write Andrea, all my best..
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Date: 8/9/2011 6:23:00 PM
Hi Andrea, very thoughtful, and made interesting! Thanks for reading my poem, God bless!
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Date: 8/9/2011 2:28:00 PM
just wanted to say you are missed.. awh, hope things are lighter on your side, now heartie.:) huggs, nette
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Date: 8/9/2011 2:23:00 PM
witty write, thank you for your kind comments on my poems, I don't kid myself I know that I am a neophyte in poetry I'm not very good but I do love to write...with love...old Jack
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Date: 8/9/2011 10:08:00 AM
Awesome write dear poet ! I needed this wit today, and I thank you and Susan ! Have a wonderful week Andrea ! Much love, james
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Date: 8/9/2011 10:01:00 AM
This really made me smile Andrea. This one should go in a children's book. It's got great rhythm and rhyme. Good imagery. And it's fun. God Bless, JB
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Date: 8/9/2011 8:36:00 AM
Cute..Reads like you two had fun with this..Thanks for the kind review of my work..Sara
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Date: 8/9/2011 7:24:00 AM
RE. Your interest in my write..... thats the mystery darling..lol....always Michael
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Date: 8/9/2011 5:18:00 AM
A very nice collab. Very creative! Have a wonderful day, Andrea
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Date: 8/9/2011 12:59:00 AM
I sure enjoyed this collab of yours with Susan :) heehee I sure can imagine those eyes like olive pits and yup, sardines are pretty ok with me, but just plain 'ol Ritz crackers would be better :) Very cute tail rhymes you have here :D hugs to you!
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Date: 8/9/2011 12:56:00 AM
Interesting form and content too, Andrea! Thanks for sharing and thank you for your comments on my poem. Caroline.
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Date: 8/9/2011 12:52:00 AM
Very nice....Enjoyed this collaboration write.
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Date: 8/8/2011 6:13:00 PM
Very funny and a warm, read from the two of you...smiles across.....luv Michael
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Date: 8/8/2011 5:32:00 PM
Great fun and witty, I love it lovely Ladies Andrea and Susan...with love...old Jack
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Date: 8/8/2011 4:13:00 PM
Well you guys mentioned two things that I am not crazy about.. the sardine and olive lol.. enjoyed this :) lfde Wilma
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Date: 8/8/2011 3:12:00 PM
just playing, andie??.. this is a gem, so impressed with how you described a fish, wow! :) huggs, nette
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Date: 8/8/2011 3:07:00 PM
very cool to both poets who mingled well.. that sardine on a Ritz... is a little smelly for me..haha... luv from the beach..hot hot here today..oh luv it..
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Date: 8/8/2011 3:02:00 PM
love my Ritz crackers, but oh those sardines you can have. But did love this piece, very creative piece for you and Susan. thank you for commenting on Under the Stars, one thing i miss about Iowa is the fireflies, we don't have them here In Denver. yes my back is doing better each day, but starting to hurt now, been on here for a while.
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Date: 8/8/2011 2:40:00 PM
LOL You and Susan wrote a clever one together. Love both verses! (Hate olives and sardines, but love those Ritz crackers.) Great work. Love, Carolyn
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Date: 8/8/2011 11:43:00 AM
Great write! Enjoyed reading this clever little poem, thanks!!
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