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The Twelve Days
The Twelve Days of my Christmas Wedding On the first day of Christmas for what it did to me a bride the size of a balsam tree On the second day of Christmas for what it did to me two little brats and a bride the size of a balsam tree! On the third day of Christmas for what it did to me three usher elves, two little brats and a bride the size of a balsam tree! On the fourth day of Christmas for what it did to me four whiny guests, three usher elves, two little brats and a bride the size of a balsam tree! On the fifth day of Christmas for what it did to me five grumpy in laws, four whiny guests, three usher elves, two little brats and a bride the size of a balsam tree! On the sixth day of Christmas for what it did to me six shots of gin, five grumpy in laws, four whiny guests, three usher elves, two little brats and a bride the size of a balsam tree! On the seventh day of Christmas for what it did to me seven dead poinsettias, six shots of gin, five grumpy in laws, four whiny guests, three usher elves, two little brats and a bride the size of a balsam tree! On the eighth day of Christmas for what it did to me eight ugly bridesmaids, seven dead poinsettias, six shots of gin, five grumpy in laws, four whiny guests, three usher elves, two little brats and a bride the size of a balsam tree! On the ninth day of Christmas for what it did to me nine skanky cousins, eight ugly bridesmaids, seven dead poinsettias, six shots of gin, five grumpy in laws, four whiny guests, three usher elves, two little brats and a bride the size of a balsam tree! On the tenth day of Christmas for what it did to me ten boring toasts, nine skanky cousins, eight ugly bridesmaids, seven dead poinsettias, six shots of gin, five grumpy in laws, four whiny guests, three usher elves, two little brats and a bride the size of a balsam tree! On the eleventh day of Christmas for what it did to me eleven prayers to die, ten boring guests, nine skanky cousins, eight ugly bridesmaids, seven dead poinsettias, six shots of gin, five grumpy in laws, four whiny guests, three usher elves, two little brats and a bride the size of a balsam tree! On the twelfth day of Christmas for what it did to me twelve divorce lawyers, eleven prayers to die, ten boring guests, nine skanky cousins, eight ugly bridesmaids, seven dead poinsettias, six shots of gin, five grumpy in laws, four whiny guests, three usher elves, two little brats and a bride the size of a balsam tree! November 23, 2014
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Book: Reflection on the Important Things