Another mans trash
Today I feel like trash
My mind a broken mirror
My body a crushed aluminum can
My arms and legs feel like crayons
When they snap after coloring too hard
One piece becomes two pieces
Something useful becomes something useless
Despite being more than one
I feel like nothing
As I'm thrown into a suffocating plastic bag
I can't move from under my covers
I can't bring myself to open my eyes
To witness a day of being discarded
I have family and friends
They love me but can't crawl into my head
Just to feel what it's like
To be trash
Today I feel like treasure
My mind a shiny mirror
The image it reflects distorted and fuzzy
My body a tall glass of water
Warm after being in the sun
It makes my throat feel funny as I swallow
Im out of bed by 7:15 am
Pacing up and down the hallway
It's hard to confirm what's happening around me
My surroundings are slow and small
My heart is racing and my palms are sweaty
I spend the day using the treasure I earn
Buying stuff that won't make me feel like trash
Makeup, perfume, anything that makes me feel better
My sparkle is starting to dull by about 2:15 pm
The things I bought make me want to cry
I don't feel like myself anymore
I don't like myself anymore
The day was a blur and I can't seem to hear the voices call out as I cross the road
Today I am an angel
My wings are pale and sparkly in the sun
They glitter like glass on the road after a car accident
My back aches, as my wings have just emerged
My spine is crooked and wavy like a winding river
Blood drips from my shoulder blades
And blood drips
All I hear are car alarms and sirens
As I rise from the ashes
The glass on the ground shakes and dances as I make my way from the ground towards the sky
Newly clean
Newly glowing
Recycled
A pile of trash transformed into an angel
A pile of trash becoming something perfect
In the eyes of God
But as I reach
My arms grow tired
My wings hurt as I stretch them and push them up towards the sky
They start to shrink
The white feathers growing dull and grey
The grey feathers growing sharp and black
I scream as I'm torn from my freedom
I wail as I'm torn away from the white clouds and pearly gates
I look above and remember how being treasure felt
I wish I was bubbling with gold again
Today I am wounded
My wings are now bony and bare
Small and shriveled
Like a flower being rained on by weed killer
I wince when I flutter them unconsciously
My shoulder blades feel like real blades
Dipping deep into my back
I feel like trash
I will always be trash
No one will ever love an angel with no wings
Today I am a demon
The treasure feeling has grown bigger than me
My heart, no longer beating, clicks on again
I watch from below
Looking above
I've grown greedy and slow
My wings are creaky bones
And my eyes no longer
I can only wish to be treasure
But as I observe my mortal body from below
I realize I will never be
buried
Given flowers
Rained on
No one cared enough for my name to be etched into a giant rock
I watch as my body
Is truly treated like trash
Stuck in a body bag
Thrown in the back of a car
And discarded among a landscape
Not of flowers and grass
But glass
Broken crayons
And aluminum
All which could've been used again
I suppose I am truly at home now
Just another mans trash
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