And don't tell me God works in mysterious ways', Yossarian continued 'There's nothing mysterious about it, He's not working at all. He's playing. Or else He's forgotten all about us. That's the kind of God you people talk about, a country bumpkin, a clumsy, bungling, brainless, conceited, uncouth hayseed. Good God, how much reverence can you have for a Supreme Being who finds it necessary to include such phenomena as phlegm and tooth decay in His divine system of Creation? What in the world was running through that warped, evil, scatalogical mind of His when He robbed old people of the power to control their bowel movements? Why in the world did He ever create pain?
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That's the kind of God you people talk about - a country bumpkin, a clumsy, bungling, conceited, uncouth hayseed. Good God, how much revernece can you have for a supreme being who finds it necassary to include such phenomena as phlegm and tooth decay in His system of creation?
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Success and failure are both difficult to endure. Along with success come drugs, divorce, fornication, bullying, travel, meditation, medication, depression, neurosis and suicide. With failure comes failure.
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Frankly, I'd like to see the government get out of war altogether and leave the whole field to private industry.
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The enemy is anybody who's going to get you killed, no matter which side he's on.
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so convincing were those dreams of being awake that he woke from them in a state of complete exhaustion, and had to go straight back to sleep again.
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I intend to live forever or die trying.
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We do have a zeal for laughter in most situations, give or take a dentist.
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He had decided to live forever or die in the attempt.
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There was no telling what people might find out once they felt free to ask whatever questions they wanted to.
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Some people are born mediocre, some people achieve mediocrity, and some people have mediocrity thrust upon them.
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Every writer I know has trouble writing.
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I want to keep my dreams, even bad ones, because without them, I might have nothing all night long.
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Some men are born mediocre, some men achieve mediocrity, and some men have mediocrity thrust upon them.
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Catch 22
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He had decided to live for ever or die in the attempt.
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He knew everything about literature except how to enjoy it.
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Being pretty on the inside means you don't hit your brother and you eat all your peas -- that's what my grandma taught me.
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In a way the CID man was pretty lucky, because outside the hospital the war was still going on. Men went mad and were rewarded with medals. All over the world, boys on every side of the bomb line were laying down their lives for what they had been told was their country, and no one seemed to mind, least of all the boys who were laying down their young lives.
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Misery is when you make your bed and then your mother tells you it's the day she's changing the sheets.
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[And in general,] pomegranates probably won't make a significant difference in the risk of prostate cancer if other factors are not taken care of, ... We know what we need to do to be healthy.
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Misery is when grown-ups don't realize how miserable kids can feel.
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The difference between management and administration(which is what the bureaucrats used to do exclusively) is the difference between choice and rigidity.
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The first myth of management is that it exists. The second myth of management is that success equals skill.
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