Greed has poisoned men's souls, has barricaded the world with hate, has goose-stepped us into misery and bloodshed. We have developed speed, but we have shut ourselves in. Machinery that gives abundance has left us in want. Our knowledge as made us cynical; our cleverness, hard and unkind. We think too much and feel too little. More than machinery, we need humanity. More than cleverness, we need kindness and gentleness. Without these qualities, life will be violent and all will be lost.
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We didn't represent the game of baseball the way it should be played. It was pretty ugly to say the least.
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I do not wish to lose my temper because very shortly I will lose my head. Nevertheless, upon leaving this spark of earthly existence, I have t...
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Charlie Woman... woe-man... whoooa-man. She was a thief, you got to believe, she stole my heart and my cat. Judy, Betty, Josie and those hot Pussycats... they made me horny, on Saturday morning... girls of cartoo-ins will leave me in ruins... I want to to be Betty's Barney. Jane... get me off this crazy thing... called love.
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Charlie Dad, how can you hate The Colonel Stuart Because he puts an addictive chemical in his chicken that makes ya crave it fortnightly, smartass
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I don't believe that the public knows what it wants; this is the conclusion that I have drawn from my career.
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As a kid, there are some things you looked forward to. You looked forward to Charlie Brown during Halloween and you looked forward to Monday Night Football.
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I suppose that's one of the ironies of life—doing the wrong thing at the right moment.
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A friend of mine, that I had known for some time, came up one day with an old guitar. I don't know where he got it, I don't know how long he'd had it, but he knew about two chords on it. He proceeded to teach them to me, and then we proceeded to go crazy over music.
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Charlie You know, Scotland has its own martial arts. Yeah, it's called F-You. It's mostly just head butting and then kicking people when they're on the ground.
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Charlie And I'd really like to kiss you, but that's not a good idea, because then we'd start kissing on the couch, and then we'd start kissing on the bed, and I don't wanna rush into spending the night together. Harriet I'd love to spend the night together. Charlie I have no problem with that
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Man as an individual is a genius. But men in the mass form the Headless Monster, a great, brutish idiot that goes where prodded.
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A day without laughter is a day wasted.
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Let's call them years of a friendly misalliance.
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Life is a tragedy when seen in close-up, but a comedy in long-shot
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Harriet Do you actually like haggis Charlie No, I think it's repellent in every way. In fact, I think most Scottish cuisine is based on a dare.
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All I need to make a comedy is a park, a policeman and a pretty girl.
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Failure is unimportant. It takes courage to make a fool of yourself.
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The saddest thing I can imagine is to get used to luxury.
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I made a commitment to this woman that I love, this family that I love and I realized this can be fixed and it's okay to part the ego, to abandon self and just stay true to my commitment and be a man of my word. Things are really good. Today we have hope, we have a shot,
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Life could be wonderful if people would leave you alone.
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The basic essential of a great actor is that he loves himself in acting.
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Harriet What do you look for in a woman you date Charlie Well, I know everyone always says sense of humor, but I'd really have to go with breast size.
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And Charlie, don't forget about what happened to the man who suddenly got everything he ever wanted. He lived happily ever after.
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I'd sooner be called a successful crook than a destitute monarch.
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I remain just one thing, and one thing only -- and that is a clown. It places me on a far higher plane than any politician.
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There's a little vanity chair that Charlie gave me the first Christmas we knew each other. I'll not be parting with that, nor our bed-the four-poster-I'll be needing that to die in.
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Here lies Charlie McCraw, He was quick on the trigger, But slow on the draw.
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They walked out on me. They haven't done that since I was a beginner. The cycle's complete.
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The great film comedian, Charlie Chaplin, once entered a Charlie Chaplin look-a-like contest for a laugh. To his surprise he did not win.
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