Silent Screams
To stop and ask just who I am
Is very hard indeed
For everyone I've ever been
Is locked inside of me
Too much for self to understand
The silent screams I hear
Oh help me please, won't someone help
Are pleas for just my ears
Which one of me is slipping past
My ego there intact
To make me let my weakness show
And disintegrate my act
Head held high, shoulders back
Make-up and fancy clothes
Are all a part of this game I play
I'm the cast and the star of the show
I ask myself what's real in life
And this answer keeps coming to me
You fool, you fool; just look around
And reality you will see
Someone inside is trying to get through
And I know I cannot defend
My ego and all that possesses me
For I am my only friend
I hurt, I'm sick, I can't bear any more
I can't live in this world like I am
For there's no one to care, no one to share
No one to take my hand
A voice deep inside says it's easy to leave
Choose this gun and go into a sleep
My ego cries out; yes let's do it right now
Before someone changes your mind
As I pick up the gun I know I have failed
I am sorry for the others inside
But they are too weak to carry me through
And so I must say good-by
A moment has passed and out of the depths
Comes a fragment of something I know
A voice strong and clear
Fills my heart and my ears
And says; wait it's not your time to go
Take a minute, that's all; you can wait just one more
To hear what I say, please don't close the door
Close your eyes and your ears and listen to me
For I am the truth and the light
I died don't you know
In a way that was cruel
So in your life you might be free
If you'll look deep inside you'll certainly see
One of God's greatest miracles of all
For it's really no secret just misunderstood
It's love in the purest form
I shake and I'm weak
I fall to the floor
My heart is ceasing to beat
For when I looked in I knew right away
One of God's greatest miracles was me
Copyright © Bj Howell | Year Posted 2007
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