Gone
Dear,
When I think about how you made me feel my heart starts racing, palms start to sweat, and my body gets these internal warm chills.
They keep on creeping up my spine and tell my head how much I want you. I'd do anything for you. I will my life to you.
Infact you started to make my lif happy, warm, filled with love. You started some comforting and left me content. You gave me the warmth of your safety blanket, and what i thought was true happiness.
Now im just a puppet on your your strings. Your strings that sells me to other men to have you. Turning everyone around me facing me, Turning everyone facing me to turn around and walk away from me. Making ME the bad guy of your show. It seems I coaused all the pain because I'm attached to you. Because I'm so dependant on you without you I'd fall down and fall never to walk again. I'm scared to be without you. I'd die loving you with all my hatred that only turns back to that warmth. Waiting for oblivion to take us away, freeing me from from your strings and back into your arms. The reality we once lived I wish to see again never to come because you dont crave me anymore like I crave you and you dont need me as I need you. You can let me go. Drop my strings. Let me fall. Waiting for your rush of love back over me that deep down I know will never come but i pray, and pray and pray that it will! I wont make it away from you. I cant run, nor do I want to run you are with me everywhere in my mind, my heart all in my body, you left a mark on me like a scar that will never fade. A reminder of what my past consisted of and the consistency is you. You play over and over in my mind. The damage, the love, the life you took from me when I was so young and innocent. Now, I turned into my biggest fear which is you I will retie the knots until I die. You killed me with no remorse and all I am left with is the scent I used to love. The cold you once mad warm. The love that was molested into your evol. Evol love.
Copyright © Victoria Beckman | Year Posted 2016
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