Unrequited Love
Not by chance do I find myself
Awake in the dead of night; caught by fright.
The stinging pangs of a grace far from touch.
Are you real? Why such longing?
How and why do you make my heart sing so loud?
God I love you, want you and feel you stir deep within. My dreams tell me so.
I once held you close. Treasured your joy.
Too brief a glimpse of what love should be.
Stinging pangs of desire born from raging fire…
Again I awake with cold knowledge we are not together but wish to return to sleep where I find you. Such dreams are dissipating in their frequency.
No doubt dampened by reality. Smothered by denial. I wait awhile...
Shall I return to thee? Shall I close my eyes and drift again? Such intensity exists so when my eyes close I see more than when open during these bouts of selfish desire. A desire to hold you close and to hear your folly.
These latest dreams alas I know why...glimpses seen when rummaging through keepsakes locked in my mind. Love but a small child, a cap too big for its head. You look beautiful, you always have.
Maybe you belong only in dreams, dreams although less in frequency, burn brighter than ever. I will teach myself to nullify and the morning after? Such numbness of heart will remain and so on...until you find me again when in slumber.
Romeo in exile. Fair Juliet is asleep. In the dead of night must you stay.
Did you ever know how much I love you so. How could you I ask?
I drift again... stroking your hair, I capture your glare, eyes wide shut, less for eternity.
In dreams do you appear through blunted arrow and broken bow. Forgive my musings. A 1000 nights have I awoken suffocated by your bespoke soul and its grip on my innermost fragility. Too tender the soul to tender such flames.
I close my eyes and await the return of you to my arms wherein I hold you tight through this mocked up night.
Haunt me freely for these moments I feel more alive than at any other...
Copyright © Justin Fewtrell | Year Posted 2015
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