Addictive
I was so young
I was a middle schooler.
I shouldn't have been depressed in 6th grade.
I shouldn't have wanted to die by 7th grade.
I shouldn't have tried in 8th grade.
I should've been genuinely happy.
I should've been genuinely smiling.
But this simple addiction destroys everything.
My friends have me on watch.
They have little things to punish me
If they find out
It's not helping me
It's just hurting me
They don't understand.
I hate myself to the point
I contemplate my self worth
Every night until the sun rises.
Then I sleep all day
I don't want to deal with another day.
They don't get it.
No one does.
No one will.
Some say self harm isn't anything.
They don't believe it's an addiction.
It just happened to come hand in hand
With my depression
As my coping mechanism.
They think it's just because I'm sad
Upset
Lonely.
Those just make it easier to do
Excuses.
I have become numb to the pain.
Numb to the tearing
As the band aids get ripped off.
I am just a bomb
Doomed to explode.
Copyright © Kimber Robinson | Year Posted 2015
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