Maaaa’aaam
That one time in the middle of nowhere,
When we walked in on a man taking a poo.
We looked at each other, then him,
and we didn’t know what to do.
It was a dingy gas station bathroom, surely the locks could work?
How could his mistake turn us into the Jerk?
When we rushed the door open, his pants were at his shoes,
He had a wad of toilet paper in hand like he was reading the news.
He was hunched over doing what needed to be done,
Probably not expecting to make eye contact with anyone.
I held onto the door in disbelief at what I had just seen,
Shocked when he yelled, “Maaaa’aaam” in lowercase, It came off kinda mean.
Spooked and shook I didn’t know what to do,
Never in my life had I seen a guy taking a poo!
With eyes as big as saucers, I sprinted for the van,
I needed to get far far away from that man!
My husband laughed for minutes straight as our tires squealed,
Now I always knock on bathroom doors and keep my eyes peeled!
Copyright © Alyshia Rebeck | Year Posted 2026
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