My Addiction To Your Love Was Worse Than Any Substance Because Nobody Told Me Love's Homicidal
x You,
the one who hurts me.
x You,
the one who chains me.
x You,
the one who controls me like a puppet.
x You,
the one who has my strings tied to your fingers.
x You're making my choices yours and I've gotten used having no say.
x Weave the webbing you create,
Trap me like a fly.
x Everytime you hurt me,
I manage to pretend that I am blind.
Im clearly not but I lie and tell myself
"She cant be that bad!"
... Can she?
x To me you're like a cigarette,
Im addicted to your love despite it being the thing that's killing me, I don't want to stop but this time I won't let myself answer your calls.
x Instead,
you fill up my head.
Memories,
Cravings,
Feelings.
Withdrawal drowns me.
x I should burn every excuse I made for your abuse,
But I don't.
x Keep promising myself I won't go back to you,
But I've never quit successfully.
x Halfway through another cigarette,
I promised it'd be my last 3 packs ago.
But I knew I'd likely never quit.
I don't even get a buzz anymore,
I feel nothing for them.
x I feel nothing for you.
Pain is fuel for frustration,
Because I don't have a will to quit.
x You lassoed me and pulled me in,
just to tear me and my everything apart.
Thoughts of you flood back any time I leave,
a voice of silk whispering to me.
Claiming one more time won't hurt.
I'm not strong enough to ignore it and it senses my fear.
x I said it was the last time last time. x
x I know the damage even a tiny taste can do.
I swear it's the last hit I'll take of you.
x I don't wanna be alone.
I tell myself your toxic love is like cigarettes or drugs.
Addictive, deadly, and damage can only be seen with the eye of time.
x I need to find a way out of your faux love web,
but I can't see through the fog your kiss leaves.
x You're like a cigarette. I'm desperate to stop but at the same time, I don't wanna quit.
PersephonesPain
Info
Entry #1
Date
Wed. x 00:30-06:10 x 26-1-22
Inspo
Nicotine, P!aTD.
Copyright © Kore Barreto | Year Posted 2022
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