This Is Involuntary
Sometimes it comes back and hits you
Harder than the hit the fan.
You were just being you and doing
Whatever it is that you do and then
All of a sudden there's a polar bear on your chest
Cold and unmoving
Taking your breath because of its beauty and your undeniable dread
It took how long to forget though not forgive?
But now you're back again to hold me captive yet another time
Do you ever tire of locking yourself inside of my body
Ruling from my mind while telling your minions to dance on my heart strings
Maybe it didn't occur to you that I'm happier
When you don't take control I don't want you here
You hurt
And yet
I don't call someone to shoot the polar bear dead instead
Instead I admire every feature of its face while sobbing uncontrollably
And remember when the terrifying polar bear was once a playful loving cub
Please go away because I want you to come back
I try to push it all away through I fail
I'm tired of this month after month I'm through I'm through
Get the hell out of my mind remove yourself from atop my chest
I miss you
Copyright © Jessica Stowers | Year Posted 2019
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