Requiem of Solitude
Alone….in a home full of people,… is that possible? Alone I wait in my personal
lair of gloomy despair hoping for the light of aspiration to appear before me to
some how save me…. Save me…save me from my quickening demise
inspired by self hatred. Its lonely in here, and I have no one to blame I alone bare
the shame of the erosion of my faith in anything. I’ve tried to take the road less
traveled but all the baggage that I have wouldn’t allow me that freedom…
freedom… freedom to walk around with a continuous smile that I’ve wanted to
display so dearly these last 21 years. But fear holds me back because I’m afraid
that if I allow anyone to see me enjoying life and living freely they’ll want to take it
from me. Hurt is the only feeling I feel I’m worth being given . It hurts living like
this so I sometimes wonder how it would feel if I didn’t exist. And yet some flicker
of hope lives in the back of my mind hoping through time I’ll one day feel worthy
of receiving the feelings that I now deny any entry into my life.
Copyright © Andrea Hicks | Year Posted 2006
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