Details |
Jeannette Lake Poem
His hands are small a lot like mine this I can recall, only to see no mirror upon this wall. Just look at my eyes they are not one of another, they are the eyes you left me with just like my mother. On egg shells we walked never knowing when it was ok to talk, we might say or do the wrong thing only knowing better to dodge your swing. You always said blood was thicker than water, so why did you teach us love was about hurting each other? We were your puppets and you was our master only bound to end in a tangle of disaster. You said you held the world in your hands, I wish I knew where it was that I stand.
Remember the time you said "I raised you the best I could?" Was you thinking the same thing when you were slamming my face into the car hood? Or how about the time you beat me so bad I peed my pants right where I stood? You took something from me that took 35yrs to get back don't worry dad I had to makeup for all that you lacked, while you were out busy dealing and abusing your crack! So many nights the aroma of whiskey lingered from your breath, only to awake in the morning seeing you passed out on the kitchen floor only to be half dressed. Don't you realize how that scared us to death! We were your children for gods sake, but you didn't care because you are nothing but a disgusting snake! All we ever wanted was a loving father someone we felt safe with like we did our mother. We couldn't stay in our house so we had to disguise ourselves and seek help from the shelters. So many emotions you put us through anger, fear, hate and isolation. Heck we wasn't even allowed to play, only time we did is when you were away. As I got older you would say "please stay one more shot and ill put it away". One turned into three knowing deep within me I just wanted to flee I just knew what it was going to be. Me on my knee begging to plea. Then you would say " Your nothing to me just get out and let me be!" I turned and looked at him and said "you know one day your gonna miss me!" He just replied,"I now have the one that I adore she's all I'll need forever more." Only if she knew what was bound to be as she became wife number three and by the way her name is Cherie. Year after year you put us last, don't worry dad because now YOUR just an impression of MY past. Now the tables have turned please tell me how does it feel to be the one put LAST!?
Copyright © Jeannette Lake | Year Posted 2017
|
Details |
Jeannette Lake Poem
In the darkened corner she hides fearing the rage that keeps banging on her door, bringing the storm before the heavy down pour.
Her sweat is mixed with tears, her face is now covered with dark streaks of fear for this time there is no shelter, no place to runaway and hide.
With darkened eyes and a heavy pace you go back in forth like your getting ready to come in for the vulnerable prey.
She arises when you open the door you stand there with your fists of power hitting, slapping and cursing while lashing your punishment until she buckles and falls to the floor.
She just lies there curled up like a ball screaming "Daddy please no more"
You left that little girl lost within, her soul now bruised and battered and you wonder why she doesn't let anyone in.
Once again she survived only to be told to "Get up and go wash your eyes!" Why can't her bruises be disguised.
Copyright © Jeannette Lake | Year Posted 2017
|
Details |
Jeannette Lake Poem
Through the images of your father and mother I see the beautiful children they had made together. Now times have changed and I'm not just another, through life's circumstances I am now your step mother.
Parent's can't choose their children the choice isn't their's to decide, I am one of the lucky ones I got to pick who's by my side. While at times having to swallow and put all feelings aside only to know what it does to your pride. My roll here isn't to divide or to take anyone's place. I am also not here just to fill an empty space.
I know I wasn't here from the start, that doesn't prevent me from loving and caring for you with all of my heart.
No one ever said raising a family would be easy, it may seem to start out as a beautiful picture of the ideal image you want to portray, only to realize that one day it could be torn or ripped apart. That's not what you expected? That's not your ideal family....A portrait of art?
Don't ignore the fact that you have more people to love and care for you, for reassurance it's ok to show it back, nobody is going to come at you in attack.
So if your ever uncertain about how I feel? I'm ok with the fact that you have a past that doesn't include me, or a step parent I would not be. I am taking baby steps ....1....2....3.... I am always here for you, you can count on me.
Copyright © Jeannette Lake | Year Posted 2017
|
Details |
Jeannette Lake Poem
While all of my pieces are slowly put back together they seem to be scattered, torn and battered they are the person I wasn't meant to be. I am a puzzle of the many pieces I once was, now they are forming a beautiful and distinct inspiration of something bigger and better that came from my original piece.
I am no longer a puppet of someone else's will nor am I a prisoner of my body and mind. Even though a simple smell, touch or place will pose a trigger or a memory of long ago. I will no longer allow those senses to control me and what I have become. I now feel affection from the ones I love. I feel the comfort from their warm embraces where before I felt empty and cold with fear that no one dares to faces. Now I can show my pieces even though they are not my whole. I am more to this flesh and blood, my skin does not portray who or lied beneath, my expressions now show how I really feel and my eyes can now tell the stories of all the untold.
Copyright © Jeannette Lake | Year Posted 2017
|