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Noah Bradford Poem
You’ve got galaxy blood running through your veins. You’re my metaphor, you are my past, present, and future. You are everything beautiful, you are a wind that urges a cloud past a star. You dissolved my cloud, you revealed a galaxy behind my eyes. You make up every jagged, misfit edge in my heart. You complete me entirely as the sun gives the moon light to shine on their own. You’ve got galaxy blood running through your veins, darling, and there is no way anyone could possibly dim the bright, black space within you. You encompass everything I want to be. You are strength. You are brilliance. You are holding me to your chest when I am the furthest from lovable I’ve ever been. You are my hand to hold when I am reaching out to Death himself. You match the thunder of your heart to the pathetic tap mine makes against my ribs. You take over when I burn out. You breathe life into me with your words
and your smile, oh your smile, Abigayle Faith, is the most breath-taking thing I’ve ever had the pleasure to witness. They say a smile can brighten a room but yours darling, your smile has the power to brighten the cavern in my soul. Your smile illuminates the pit of black nothing I have a bad habit of falling into. Your smile brings me to tears, knowing you are happy. You are never happy. You are radiating with life always.
So thank you for writing for me and about me. I may not be good with understanding your sarcasm and I sure suck at paying you back for all the money I’ve borrowed but hell, this is the best I can do. I love you to the very edges of your existence. I love you down to the very depths where no one but you has traveled to with trepidation. I love the thoughts in your head and the words in your mouth.
Thank you for not giving up on me. Thank you for loving me to the very bitter end. Thank you for rain soaked Converse and every pleading gaze and every squeeze of your hand and those words you burned into my wrists: “You Can Make It.” Thank you for your galaxy blood. Thank you for making me a part of your glow. Thank you for lighting my Candle once more.
Copyright © Noah Bradford | Year Posted 2016
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Details |
Noah Bradford Poem
I spent five dollars too many at the gas station.
I thought about the weather.
It was oddly cool for an August evening.
I woke up an hour ago
From a dream that created unnerving parallels between he and
I
We were the same, I suppose.
We hated each other.
But not enough for this.
Hate and miss are synonymous in my head and
I never thought I could hate him this much.
I hated him but
God I never imagined I could miss him this much
Last year she promised me he had left,
but after a pause, she said,
"No, no, he's okay. He's in virtual school now. He's okay."
I never liked crying like this
But I'm stranded in a gas station parking lot
And there are so many empty chairs beside me
I can't help but wonder if
I bought him ice cream he would eat it
In silence, sure.
He would eye me in suspicion, give me a strange look, and
not thank me
But we would sit in company.
Company that would be forced, suffocating,
but together.
Was the sky crying too?
We lost someone we didn't need
But I never thought I would need him now.
I would be content without seeing him
for the rest of my life.
But not like this.
Did Gabe like blueberries?
Maybe not. Maybe he liked blackberries
I hate being that customer but I went in four minutes to close and
drifted through the store, Dizzy with grief I thought I had slept off
I bought mourning blackberries
I forgot how much I didn't like these,
But I bought them impulsively for Gabe.
Grieving fruit.
They were moldy.
I wondered if that was some kind of cruel
irony,
But the only thing I could comprehend was that
Gabe is dead gabe is dead gabe is dead.
He was always laughing.
At someone's expense, but at least he was happy.
I hated that he was always laughing at someone
I hate now that I hated him
Everyone wants to take it all back
But he is in possession of it all now
Maybe I'll be okay with that one day.
I think I let myself be stupid so he could smile from it
But that's not true, only
the ghost of regret in my head.
I never gave you a second thought but
All of a sudden you're the only thing
I hear.
Nobody wants to think about this anymore than I do
And I want to
apologize but I can't
He never did so why should I
If he saw me like this now
How much this is messing me up
He'd say something dumb and snarky and
altogether useless
But at least he knew.
Let him do with that what he will.
Because there's nothing we can do for him now.
Go boy, run for your life.
Copyright © Noah Bradford | Year Posted 2016
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