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Caroline Ball Poem
Reaching out in the dark
for something that is now history
instead all alone by myself
my only friend is my own misery
True joy turned bitter memory
You destroyed me so damn beautifully
a friend turned lover, a lover turned mortal enemy,
yet this hatred I pretend to carry so easily
is a merely a mask to hide that i worship you like a deity
You left me broken and ashamed
Yet I only had myself blame
And now that you're only an image in my mind,
I will bury you deeply
in the part of my soul where all my sweetest dreams hide.
Copyright © Caroline Ball | Year Posted 2020
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Caroline Ball Poem
She's the same little girl she always was,
Lost and afraid with no one to trust,
The years of torment etched out on her face,
The agony of self hatred with no chance of escape.
Her thoughts are destructive,
Her reflection is sickly,
She hates herself
But that hatred is always hidden so deeply.
The man never notices her silent pain
She tries to show him but always in vain
Who can save this damaged soul?
Only herself because nobody knows.
Copyright © Caroline Ball | Year Posted 2020
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Caroline Ball Poem
Have you ever been enslaved by a substance?
Danced with the devil
or gladly embraced your own self destruction?
Have you ever lost complete control?
Had a monkey on your back
Willingly given up everything even your own very soul?
Have you ever stared in the face of death?
Lost everything
Even begged for life's final breath?
Have you ever been brought to your knees?
Disgusted by your own reflection
Plagued by a suicidal disease?
Have you ever sacrificed all those you love?
Been stripped of your pride
Never able to rise above?
This is what addiction is like
Absolute misery
It only seeks to destroy your life.
And don't think it can't happen to you
That is what makes it so insidious
We addicts were normal once to.
Copyright © Caroline Ball | Year Posted 2020
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