The Intoxicated Alien
By Elton Camp
Zork from planet Ork is at it again
He came, a crop circle to begin
Extraordinary power he’d wield
Patterns make in a corn field
“Earthlings will know we’re here
And this will cause them to fear”
Zork made sure he wasn’t late
So set his saucer to warp eight
But even traveling all that fast
Several days the trip did last
So he brought a bottle of gin
But, too often, he did upend
Zork reached the field all right
But he was extremely tight
He was dizzy, he soon found
His ship went zig zag all around
A most chaotic pattern he made
“Go home, alien,” he was bade
“Stupid drunk,” Orkians did say
Made him attend their local AA
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