The offer said I had a CHANCE to win
a two-week trip--with all expenses paid--
to Scotland. Here’s the list of stringent rules
that followed (I then closed my eyes and prayed):
“to wear a kilt and dance the Highland Fling
before a crowd at local talent shows;
to memorize “Tam Lin” and then go sing
before a Celtic judge who’s strict and knows
his comments come across as forceful blows;
to list these: findings of LNIB*,
most famous castles tourists rush to see,
two hundred facts from Scottish history,
five reasons why I think you should choose ME
as winner of this two-week trip—for FREE!
To prove compliance, fill out these ten forms,
and have them notarized. Submit them all
within two weeks, assuring you MAY be
the ONE who goes to Scotland in the fall!”
So, did I soon declare, “I can’t abide
by such demanding rules” and toss aside
that offer? NO! I now announce with pride
trip preparations are well underway.
I’ll pack that kilt that helped me to convey
my wish to go to Scotland—and not pay!
*Loch Ness Investigation Bureau (1962-1972)
March 26, 2021
Scotland--One-Rule Contest
Sponsor: Julia Ward
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