Long Parodyhate Poems

Dieting (Lyrics To Tune of Yesterday)

Dieting. .  How I wish my fat would go away,
But my love handles are here to stay
And so I just keep dieting. 

Torturous. . . Not an inch lost since it was begun.
No reward for all the work I’ve done.
Oh, dieting is torturous.
 
Why the fat won’t go, I don’t know. Discouraging!
It’s a long cruel wait. How I hate this awful DI ET INGGGG

Dieting. . . Will I ever really be set free
in this weight-obsessed society?
And so I just keep dieting.

Why the fat won’t go, I don’t know. Discouraging!
It’s a long cruel wait. How I hate this awful DI ET INGGGG

Dieting. . . I’m 9 sizes past a sweet size 3.
How I wish my clothes would hang on me.
And so I just keep dieting. . . So I just keep dieting.
(fade out: uuuuhhhhggggggg)

note: I am not really all THAT fat, but I AM obsessed!