Best Funnypain Poems


Take a Toke

Light up a joint, lets give it a whirl,
the illness you have is making you hurl.

The pain is so bad you want to cry,
take a couple of tokes and you'll be high.

The pain will dim as you stumble down the block,
time seems to be dragging, but not the clock.

Don't mind if you catch yourself mumbling,
run to the refrigerator, your stomach is grumbling.

A foot long sub and a bag of potato chips,
before you know it, pants get stuck on hips.

Forget the urge of wanting to shop,
you may get pulled over by a cop.

Insurance will not pay, it will cost you money,
that's all good, because you'll think it's funny.

Soon your head will feel like you're drinking booze.
Time to lay down for a nice little snooze.

Time to wake up and break out, the chronic weed.
If you want this "medicine" go plant a seed.

It may not be legal but a doctor has the say,
of what he wants to give you to take pain away.

It's up to an individual how to manage their pain,
I would rather not kill, the cells in my brain.


For Michael Jordans Medical Marijuana Contest
© Karla Null  Create an image from this poem.

Premium Member Adam Speaks To Eve

I was all alone
  When first I did roam
     Through our Paradise,
So I asked Him above
  For someone to love
    And He made you, oh, so nice.

You were a pain in the side
  When I first did abide
    To let Him borrow my rib,
But Eve it is true
  When first I saw you
    I was certainly glad that he did.

Then you were a pain in the neck
  When you said, “What the heck,
    Let’s eat the apple forbidden.”
And a pain in the ass
  When you and that asp
    From Eden had us all driven.

So stop nagging me
  To find a fig tree
    So you can buy yourself some clothes,
We’ve committed a sin
  And now within
    The evil is starting to grow.

But in the end
  I’ll admit my friend
    That even with this pain and sorrow,
I’d have to say
  It’s a better today
    Than if you weren’t here tomorrow.


Dedicated to LMB and all Eves without leaves.  
I think its time we returned to Paradise, shed our insecurities, 
our fear of our naked bodies, our outter garments and all hop into the hot tub together.  
Mine is heated and has plenty of room.  All are invited to make Poet soup.
© Joe Flach  Create an image from this poem.

Bone In My Leg

There's a bone in my leg and this is why you see I cannot possibly do dishes with this
kind of pain in me . There's a bone in my leg and as i have told you before the pain would
be overwhelming if i helped you sweep the floor. There's a bone in my leg and that's just
the way that it is I remember the day that it happened it happened when I was just a kid
my mom told me I needed responsibility like the grown-ups did and a pain shot right up my
shin. and yep you probley guessed it there was a bone in my leg it's true so you just
better get a grip I'm not doin chores with you


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