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Well you should see my story-reading baby, you should hear things that she says
She says "
Hon, drop dead, I'd rather go to bed with Gabriel Garcia Marquez"
Cuddle up with William S. Burroughs, leave on the light for bell hooks
I been flirtin' with Pierre Burton 'cause he's so smart in his books I like to go out dancing My baby loves a bunch of authors My heart's so broke and bleedin' Baby's just sittin' there doin' some readin'
So I started watching some TV, played my new CD player too
She said "
Turn it off or I'll call the cops, and I'll throw the book at you"
All this arguing made me get dizzy, called my doctor to came have a look
I said "
Doctor, hurry!" She said: "
Don't worry, I'll be over when I finish my book" I like to go out dancing My baby loves a bunch of authors We've been livin' in hovels Spendin' all our money on brand new novels
So I got myself on the streetcar and it drove right into someone
The driver said: "I was looking straight ahead!" but he was reading the Toronto Sun
So my honey and me go to a counsellor to help figure out what we need
She said: "
We'll get your love growin', but before we get goin' here's some books I'd like you to read" I like to go out dancing My baby loves a bunch of authors Lately we've had some friction '
Cause my baby's hooked on short works of fiction
So we split and went to a party, some friends my girl said she knew
But what a sight 'cause it's authors night and the place looks like a who's who
Now I'm poundin' the Ouzo - with Mario Puzo
Who's a funny fella? - W.P. Kinsella
Who brought the cat? - would Margaret Atwood?
Who needs a shave? - he's Robertson Davies!
Ondartje started a food fight, salmon mousse all over the scene
Spilled some dressing on Doris Lessing these writer types are a scream! I like to go out dancing My baby loves a bunch of authors We'll be together for ages Eatin' and sleepin' and turnin' pages
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