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Enter Poem or Quote (Required)Required Ted was a professional farter and at his windy recitals he’d boast that could even toot Moonlight Sonata If his wife fed him baked beans on toast! There was an annual farting competition Held in downtown Chicago, (the ‘Windy City’) Ted had pre-loaded his guts for the mission To lose his title would be such a pity Ted knew that the competition was stiff His groaning guts how they gurgled away He farted an exceptional guitar riff hoping he’d be winning the trophy that day Ted raised his left leg and let rip But disaster was about to strike His todger got caught in his zip The searing agony Ted did dislike Limping off the stage in great pain Bitter tears fell from his blue eyes He re-adjusted his trousers again Could he retain that coveted prize? Now Ted returned to his farting position With the microphone close to his tush And with determination and good nutrition He farted all of ‘Mystic Rhythms’ by Rush The audience gave Ted a standing ovation (Lucky for them they weren’t too near the stage) And much to Ted’s delight and jubilation The judges thought his farting was all the rage Ted was eventually declared the winner And he returned home to his lovely wife She’d prepared chicken curry for his dinner To safeguard his job for the rest of his life! 06-30-17
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