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Evolution of No 1 Tu Love - 'Warning: Depressive'
EVOL UT I ON ... NO 1 TU LOVE (The Eden Agenda III) I have loved most everyone, yet so few have loved me back. So much good I have done, but suspicions aroused, they attack. How I so long to drown my sorrows and drown in a tank of arrack. Is it that they are taken aback, or is it ‘true love’ they truly lack? How can one with so much love get so little love back? As long as I have lived, I’ve lived to love so long as I’ve loved to live. But how can I live for long in a world that does not love to give? ….nor has love enough to give? Surely I must grieve. …Or perhaps I shall evolve to no longer believe in all that I perceive. Therein lies the urge for the surge of my dirge. Rejected of love, subjected to hate - now dejected with life. So sensitive that my soul is sliced by the blunt end of a knife. To whom shall I turn for bandage for these emotional scars? Even in moments of desperation I’ve looked up to the stars For out there [I’ve been told] is that which is the Sea of Tranquility, All I have here is a Dead Sea - in which to drown with my vulnerability. My shadow refuses to be seen with me - it’s nowhere to be seen at high noon, Come setting of the Sun, it runs further from me - and stretches out for the Moon. Why do I not shine such that the Sun beams …and perhaps even squints? Why do the vultures retch? ….and away from my carcass, the hyena sprints? I have looked up to the raindrops from heaven - simply yearning to be kissed, But even they, with accursed stealth - my sad lips they missed. Who shall cut me a slice of love? Please apportion a portion. Who will pour me a cup of warmth? Please don’t ration the passion. My spirit is broken, the Spirits have spoken… The daemons mean to take my life as a token. Let ‘Caution’ throw me to the wind, I pray; Havoc, please invite me out to play. Misery, won’t you hold my hand ….everyday? Loneliness won’t you be my friend? …Please stay. Oh, how I feel so low, so lifeless. But then, who cares? Just another life less…. ….another life less …just another lifeless. The evolution of my life, I’ve looked at from back to front: ……no 1 tu love. The creation of my life, I’ve looked, from on high to low: …….Love from above. (The Fg 81.5.8)
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Book: Shattered Sighs