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Enter Poem or Quote (Required)Required Another haunted night, I watch raindrops fall from consolatory words, track each plane flying south, and I think of you. My lungs empty a lonely sigh… I bullet a dark, heaving sky with my angry words as I curse you for walking away again. I remember the starlings that came earlier; they circled low, then perched along the eaves while the sun held me in afternoon glow, as if to say goodbye, friend. We will meet again. I should have known. Night after night, shadows march a solemn procession across a long-faced moon. I know he is mourning, too. Weeds tangle my thoughts until I dream in a web of mismatched memories and neglected clues - so many questions, left in a heap at the foot of our bed, no answers said out loud. Solitude plays games with my heart; mocking me tonight, the house wins again. Why do I gamble after I lost you before? How many times have you walked out that door? I try to mend cracks exposed when darkness fades into golden dawn. I try to color my crumpled world like a child. I paint smiles on your face in our albums to tell myself lies. I replay the moment you walked away; I envision every detail down to one lace that dangled from your new shoes, new shoes bought to step into our new life together. I remember when we wrapped ourselves in our dreams to keep warm. One day, your face will dissolve like a rain puddle on a summer day. One day, I’ll say goodbye and start again. Maybe today will be that day. At least today, I’ll try. A lone starling in a dark, glossy suit lands on my window sill at break of dawn. It wakes me with its sweet, warbled song and waits long enough for me to rise from bed so I might feel the promise of a new day shine into my soul. Then, as my tears fall soft like spun silk, he spreads his wings and flies away. In light of dawn’s blessings, I am the starling, singing a goodbye song. I pray, tonight, I dream of anyone but you. written April, 2014
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