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Enter Poem or Quote (Required)Required It's hard What is? The feigned facade displayed on Caps on my face The last thing I am is brave In the dark, I'm everything I want to be In the light, I'm who they want me to be. It's hard What is? The imposed words gushing from their mouths with the resonance of stamps Like rules but they are beliefs Beliefs that I am something more Define more? I mean great Inexorable convictions stamped like fulfilled routines of their daily affairs Oh they think I'm a thing! It's not fair! Mother's perfect white dentition spread wide like the gossip of the market women As I exit the interview room, As I walk down the stairs As I walk into the academic hall As I anticipate their expectations that it should turn out right Her smiles are bright but not my psych. Dad says I stand out and I know I do But not in the way he assumes I don't hate to disappoint For that is me, it's what I always do. But what could be at stake? The fast growing bubble that may burst And they get to find out my name, I mean my name The one weighed by shame The one I'm afraid to utter For it may sound familiar to their ears and then go up in flames With no remains or crumbs for tomorrow And I'll hear it for the hundredth time, “i told you so” Though this time from their lips and not my mind. I wish I could hide behind the closed doors that never opened for me For somehow the four corner walls of the solitary room is not safe for me I think I'm scared of me I'm scared that if I succeed, I'll be living a fake and not being me Being accustomed to failure is real. When others believe it seems they're tryna set their records straight To have the world praise their good name for being the saving grace to failures like me Though there was never grace. The last thing I am is brave In the dark, I'm everything I am Solace in my weakness as imbecilic as it may sound In the light, I'm everything they want me to be A sham disguise infants can bet on and win Not everything can be hidden. I acknowledge the abyss The unflinching defeat that at least brings peace from its stability Even in the midst of piercing heartening So who's next please?
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