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Poured a wee dram for my friend Farmer Fred.
He just kept on shaking his head.
What’s with the head I inquired of Fred?
Sit down laddie for ya might just swoon,
When I tell ya what happened to me this very afternoon.
Whilst selling my wares down at the fair,
A lovely young lass with a head of red hair,
Wandered up and gives the wares a stare.
I greeted her in my customary way.
Good afternoon lassie you look lovely today,
Might I help you in some particular way?
Now she looks up and gives me a scowl.
I judged her humor t’was a bit fowl.
I thought I might brighten her day
With a grand compliment paid.
Lassie your hair is both beautiful and grand.
Then her scowl scrammed, and she began to howl.
Called me all manner of beast and pariah.
Her face turned red as if it were on fire.
Minutes passed before her tirade did expire.
Made me regret the cordial things I had said.
I sincerely hope that lassie is never wed.
Ill tempered heifers should never be bred!
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