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News Flash! News Flash! An epidemic of dumb, A vaccine is yet to be found, It’s covered the U.S., the U.K. and Japan, A dumb virus is hitting the ground. First diagnosed in the White House in the States, When dumb raised its ugly head, Now dumb is sweeping all over England, The scourge of dumb has insidiously spread, Emergency Help Lines for the dumb have been set up, For our first line of defence, Treating those infected with a dose of reason, A fresh dose of old common sense, So please, if you suspect someone is coming over all dumb, Give them this number to call, Else they’ll continue to be dumb, believing what’s said, And then we can do bugger all. Written 20th Feb 2018, entered into Robert Haighs "make me laugh contest" Ranked 9th
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