Login
|
Join PoetrySoup
Home
Submit Poems
Login
Sign Up
Member Home
My Poems
My Quotes
My Profile & Settings
My Inboxes
My Outboxes
Soup Mail
Contest Results/Status
Contests
Poems
Poets
Famous Poems
Famous Poets
Dictionary
Types of Poems
Videos
Resources
Syllable Counter
Articles
Forum
Blogs
Poem of the Day
New Poems
Anthology
Grammar Check
Greeting Card Maker
Classifieds
Quotes
Short Stories
Member Area
Member Home
My Profile and Settings
My Poems
My Quotes
My Short Stories
My Articles
My Comments Inboxes
My Comments Outboxes
Soup Mail
Poetry Contests
Contest Results/Status
Followers
Poems of Poets I Follow
Friend Builder
Soup Social
Poetry Forum
New/Upcoming Features
The Wall
Soup Facebook Page
Who is Online
Link to Us
Member Poems
Poems - Top 100 New
Poems - Top 100 All-Time
Poems - Best
Poems - by Topic
Poems - New (All)
Poems - New (PM)
Poems - New by Poet
Poems - Random
Poems - Read
Poems - Unread
Member Poets
Poets - Best New
Poets - New
Poets - Top 100 Most Poems
Poets - Top 100 Most Poems Recent
Poets - Top 100 Community
Poets - Top 100 Contest
Famous Poems
Famous Poems - African American
Famous Poems - Best
Famous Poems - Classical
Famous Poems - English
Famous Poems - Haiku
Famous Poems - Love
Famous Poems - Short
Famous Poems - Top 100
Famous Poets
Famous Poets - Living
Famous Poets - Most Popular
Famous Poets - Top 100
Famous Poets - Best
Famous Poets - Women
Famous Poets - African American
Famous Poets - Beat
Famous Poets - Cinquain
Famous Poets - Classical
Famous Poets - English
Famous Poets - Haiku
Famous Poets - Hindi
Famous Poets - Jewish
Famous Poets - Love
Famous Poets - Metaphysical
Famous Poets - Modern
Famous Poets - Punjabi
Famous Poets - Romantic
Famous Poets - Spanish
Famous Poets - Suicidal
Famous Poets - Urdu
Famous Poets - War
Poetry Resources
Anagrams
Bible
Book Store
Character Counter
Cliché Finder
Poetry Clichés
Common Words
Copyright Information
Grammar
Grammar Checker
Homonym
Homophones
How to Write a Poem
Lyrics
Love Poem Generator
New Poetic Forms
Plagiarism Checker
Poetics
Poetry Art
Publishing
Random Word Generator
Spell Checker
Store
What is Good Poetry?
Word Counter
Email Poem
Your IP Address: 3.147.52.13
Your Email Address:
Required
Email Address Not Valid.
To Email Address:
Email Address Not Valid.
Required
Subject
Required
Personal Note:
Poem Title:
Poem
I went on-line to find a man- the man of my dreams, but the pickin's were few and I was desperate, so when this guy said, hey S E X Y girl want to meet, I jumped to attention and we set up a date. Oh, I made myself up so p r e t t y , the mirror never lies! And at the appointed time, I was at the coffee shop. A man walked in- HOLY MACARONI, hope that's not him! YIKES! He is looking at me with a crooked smile. I squint my eyes are those missing teeth? He is coming closer and closer to my table, SON OF A WITCH, does the guy have a neck or what, its just a head placed on wide WIDE shoulders, I want to sink into the floor! H e l l o , he says looking down on my lovely head, you look just like your picture BEAUTIFUL. I look up at him, aaaah, you don't look like your picture Sir, no Sireee you don't Well, I admit he said that picture is twenty years old, oh GOSH and darn it and @@@%%%$$### how do I get out of this mess. So after some PAINFUL conversation, I excuses me self for the little GIRLIE room, and go straight through to the kitchen desperate for departure I ask the startled dishwasher for the E X I T- and I ran all the way home, slammed the door, got in my bed and pulled up the covers over my head. HOLY SMOKES that was just c r a z y - I am not that DESPERATE or Z A N Y to do that EVER again. ____________________________ November 27, 2016 Poetry/Burlesque/FALSE Advertising Copyright Protected, ID 16-853-383-0 All Rights Reserved. Written under Pseudonym. Written for the contest, Zany, sponsor, Frank Herrara Third Place
CAPTCHA Preview
Type the characters you see in the picture
Required