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Poem

I awake still down 
wishing I never woke
Speaking in questions leading to answers 
I wish I never spoke
I don't know how or why 
I keep on fighting
My only true outlet is on the paper
in which I am writing
Speaking to myself wondering 
when it will all go away
All I ever wanted was to awake 
feeling secure today
Instead I wish
that I had never awoke at all
Why do I repeatedly awake
Just to fall
Some day's I don't want to
walk, talk, feel or see
I don't want to wake up some day's
still being me 
I wish I wish I wish 
I could just be free
From all of those who misjudge, abuse and
Isolate me
They pick what they love 
Discarding all that they hate
But no one is whole 
when they strip any single trait
How can I be spoken about In manners
That destroy my own belief
Again I wish I awoke
to some sort of relief
Just want a career that gives me 
a purpose on this earth
Instead I am feeling useless
Awaiting my rebirth
My second chance to do it all over
and make better choices
maybe then I would be free
of these inner voices
Constantly asking myself if I am sure
I want to live and not die
Why cant I hear silence that doesn't 
give me reason to cry
I need a life with no outside influence
Causing internal confusion
I am tired of my inner being suffering
unlawful intrusion

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