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I really should'a read the fine print When Evil came calling On a fine sunny day I was caught full napping Didn't know what to say. The dapper gentleman With a Van Dyke set fine Spoke in dulcet tones Like sweet and mellow wine. My name is I Levi Very softly he said I grant all one's wishes Till the day they are dead. For power and for pelf If You strongly desire Or bevy of beauties To set your loins afire. You ask me what you will I'll grant it with a snap. There is no hidden catch There's no devious trap. I had heard of dealings With powers of the dark Of dire trades of soul Of hell-damnation stark. I asked of I Levi Of what I had to do Just sign he smiled and said Just common ink in blue. Great doubts I had at first But soon dispelled by greed Quickly I read the script Signed the mystic deed. Great was wealth and power My lot from that day on Youth, vigour, virility My cares and worries gone. For full twelve months I lived A life that Bacchus shamed Wild, wanton, to the brim No rein could make me tamed Then one fine sunny day While wining with a wench Came Levi with a smile And a terrible stench. Your Time's up, my dearie, He most cheerfully said You are now Satan's guest As now that you are dead. I pleaded and begged My tears started to sting I told him of the deed Where there was no such thing. Softly Levi told me What that day he had said I grant all one's wishes Till the day they are dead. Your time here is ended As ordained on Above Your soul will be taken Your Corpus feel the plough. I've now learnt my lesson Rather late in the day Caveat Emptor holds The fine print's always there. I really should'a Most carefully read da Fine print then, Goddamn it!
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