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This poem is written with a fair of Jamaican Patois but I hope you all get the drift. Cow Cock Soup Boy things a get bad, really sad. Went to bed last night Mi wife feeling fruity Mi eyes get bright Put on her nightie And gave me the invite She sey come in the boudoir But for god sake, get it right! Her patience is running out Something not right For something which is now horizontal Should be moving upright. Yellow card she already issue And whistle she no want to blow But its time mi move from centre circle And shoot for goal. She a run out of patience And cant stand the sight Of that big black thing Whey no want to stand up and fight. Mi head start hot mi Cold sweat start wash mi It may rise to the task But how long will it last? She sey this is last caution But she going on holiday And if things no improve When she gets back She going to move out Same Day!! You no suffer from arthritis Gone pass mid-life crisis So if a so things a go stay Better if we go our separate way You no have money worries She no longer need precaution She don't know why it deflate When her bun is in the oven And she want it staked Worse when there is bushes in her garden And she want it raked So mi siddung and hatch a plot What to do with this darn blasted flop Mi love my wife and want her happy So when she go on holiday Mi ago call somebody And seek some consultations From the bushman and the deacon But mi skip the pastor Mi no want his helping hand But since she gone Let me tell you wha a gwaan Met a lady who tell me about a cure Which should ease my complex And get things back Where they were before So be at ease and fret no more To remedy my anxiety and fix my droop It comes in the drinking of Cow Cock Soup She advised me to drink it in the morning Before its hot And another cup an hour Before she gets back Drink it cold, then lay on my back Slap her on the derrière Then lift her frock It would also help If you stroke her back! If that doesn't work And do the trick There is nothing else to recommend But a candle stick As soon as she got in Mi follow her instruction Lifted her frock Slapped her derriere Then stroked her back Then came this sudden stand at attention Lawd, didn't it work From a reluctant member To one which didn't shirk Well after the act I didn't have to ask Because in the throes of passion She cracked a laugh.
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