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I wish I was satiated by mediocrity. Being happy would be so easy. For others contentment is so easily bought. I wish the “same old” was good enough, so I could relax. I wish I didn’t seethe when things weren’t just right. I wish I was happy where I was, I wish I was satisfied with what life has handed me. I wish I felt complete in my relationships, so I didn’t have to struggle with the guilt of breaking up with her. I wish I woke up feeling at ease, so I didn’t have to make a daily checklist of things to do to keep my head above water. I wish headlines weren’t so discouraging and smiles weren’t so damn heavy. I wish trying to be normal wasn’t so much work. I wish I could shrug off responsibility like the rest of the world, I wish I didn’t have to do it myself all the time just to have it done right. I wish I wasn’t always the one putting out your fires. I wish I could walk away and let you burn. I wish I wasn’t so sore in the morning, I wish my skin didn’t wrinkle so, I wish the clock didn’t tick so loud and I wish they would all stop constantly reminding me that my candle is getting shorter. I wish I was fulfilled by praying to some old man in the sky. I wish I could just blindly believe it so I didn’t lie awake at night and wonder about truth.
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